The Narcissistic Predator: Cognitive Empathy and Narcisissm
If you want to see whether someone is a psychotic or a narcissist, do the yawn test. If they don’t mirror you, they could be a psychopathic narcissist. Is it just urban myth? Actually, a number of research studies have been done to demonstrate this phenomenon - it is true.
Those lacking in empathy - the capacity to emotionally respond to others and share in their emotions, would be expected to remain indifferent in the face of another’s emotional expressions. Yawning is not evolutionarily necessary, and has even been theorised to serve the function of synchronising group behaviour in some animals. As a cue of mood and emotional/physical state, that can be picked up on by group members, it can be socially useful.
The yawn test has even passed into popular culture, in a number of TV programmes such as Luther. You will have observed that yawning is frequently contagious - but if someone is low on the empathy scale, they are less likely to respond in kind.
Narcissists are usually good at observing human behaviour and cues, and even mimicking them to try to create a false connection. However, it is more of a reptilian observation, impassive and detached. You can usually pick up after a while, when somebody is particularly empathic, because they will display an “emotional resonance” with you, it’s something we sense on a gut level when we really tune in.
The “cognitive empathy” displayed by very adept narcissists means that they take it all in, even the non-verbal cues - in fact, they are very attuned to non-verbal cues, a bit like a predator circling its prey, sniffing for signs of fear, their antennae quivering with the input of the tiny signals of distress, on an almost visceral level. Like a shark sniffing trails of blood leaking from its potential quarry.
The narcissist will be alert to cues that other people are not (and this is also true of many people with borderline disorder, another cluster-B disorder). In fact, while a regular person will actually be listening to what you are saying to them, and nothing some non-verbal cues, a narcissist will be listening - but also receiving other signals that they are very focused upon, almost in a survival sense - but in the predator role.
So, they will notice you yawn, and even know when you’re about to do so - but they won’t resonate with it. Their alertness to bodily cues will be used, not, for example as a true empath would use them, in service of helping you, or as a therapist would use them as a gateway to truly understanding you. The cues will be used to access your vulnerabilities and to know which buttons to push.
Of course, being low in empathy doesn't have to mean someone is a narcissist or psychopath, they could just be somewhat detached from social cues; however they probably would be on the low side of the empathy scale. So if you do find yourself in this situation, where someone doesn’t reciprocate your yawn, don’t jump to drastic conclusions - and remember too, that if they’ve done their homework, they may already know about the yawn test…